Wednesday, January 25, 2012

My Heroes

Sometimes you have to kick the ogre in the shins to get his attention.

And Erika Baker is still my hero.


Tristan Alexander said...

Santorum isn't an Ager, he's a TROLL!

Erika Baker said...

Oh, Counterlight, and there I am thinking that you're my hero!
I get so terribly worn out by these silly conversations that never ever reach the level of actual theology but are restricted to assertions that are, ultimately, founded on nothing more than unshakeable prejudice.

A couple of days ago one of them had me in tears and it was your constructive and polite response that helped me out of a particularly unpleasant black hole.

I reserve a special dislike for having self-righteous bible quotes thrown at me, which are all the more pointless as the thrower never seems to realise that they could just be turned back and be flung at him.

It's thanks to people like you that I keep going.

Counterlight said...

Ms. Baker,

Your presence on my blog does it more honor than it can bear.

You are too kind. I assure you that I am not nice at all. Just ask some of my readers. I was born in Texas and I live in New York, and neither place is conducive to being pleasant or polite.

Indeed it is YOUR patience, as well as persistence, that is so admirable.

MarkBrunson said...

Indeed it is YOUR patience, as well as persistence, that is so admirable.

I keep tellin' her that, Counterlight, but the damned woman won't listen to reason! Got no patience for it, I give up!

Erika Baker said...

Counterlight, you are being extremely generous (and Mark, you’re being extremely funny).
But I’ve had an easy ride compared to all of you. I am bisexual and I spent the first over 40 years of my life living a conventional straight existence, white, middle class, married, kids, all the respectability you can imagine. That gives people a lot of deep seated confidence and assurance about who they are and their self-worth and their worth in the eyes of God. These are precious gifts still far too few gays and lesbians are given as a birthright.

I could not have imagined the change that would hit me after I married my wife, how people will reduce us to nothing but our sexuality, how they all have a view about it, how their view about it apparently counts more than our own knowledge of ourselves, how they assume real power over us – it’s been a shocking eye opener.

I’ve come to this debate very late but having lived on both sides of that divide I cannot let people get away with all his abuse of power and this self righteousness that dresses up as moral religiosity. Too many kids still literally die because of all this.

One thing I have learned is that the people who genuinely knew me before have all remained my friends, even if they struggled initially. I know that once people dare encounter the reality of who we are, once they see us as complex and frail human beings just like themselves, much of the irrational prejudice disappears. It’s the only thing I can do, my only strategy – to keep inviting people to get to know me, not to lash out, to cry in private when necessary.
And to rely on wonderful guys like you two to throw some of the anger and passion into the debate it also needs, as well as make those wonderfully faith and reason based arguments that no-one has yet countered with any credibility.
Together, we’ll get there, eventually.